My Personal Reflection while Listening to The Moldau

By Nancy L. Kenaston
November 17, 2011

I don’t think I will ever listen the orchestral piece of music, called The Moldau, by Bedrich Smetana, the same again. Today the local classical music radio staion began playing this piece, and having just completed my homework for the day, I turned aside from the computer, cranked up the sound, and closed my eyes, to bask in the music. I stood in the middle of the room, so as to get the best sound from the speakers, and just absorb the piece.

Halfway through the score, thoroughly enjoying it (as it is my favorite piece of classical music) I began wondering how fitting the piece might be for my own memorial service some day. Not to be morbid, but thoughts like that do cross my mind from time to time. I continued to listen to the piece, remembering that it was about the journey of a river, flowing from mountains high by castles, out to the sea. It was about a journey. It seemed a bit fitting for the end of a memorial service.

As I continued to listen, now in the part where the river leads out into the deep ocean, I continued to think about how my own spiritual journey will proceed from this life to the next. That is when my listening, turned into another experience all together.

I continued to listen, as the river flows out into the ocean, and there are powerful sounds, battle like. And I began to wonder if this piece of music could not be looked at, from a different perspective.

What if the “journey” was really about our life journey? What if, as the river flows into the ocean, the piece of music were really giving us a tiny glimpse into the spiritual reality that occurs when we pass from this temporal life to the eternal? The strong, battle like music was now playing.

As I listened, I imagined myself, passing from this earth’s realm, to a heavenly realm, before God, at the entrance to heaven. The music almost began to sound as if the “accuser” were starting to pile up accusations against me, before God Almighty, hoping to point out what a wretched sinner, black and stained, I was. The accusations piled up higher and higher, and they seemed to get bigger, and deeper, and more injurious, and more damning, the longer the accuser spewed them forth. The accuser’s fervor is almost palpable, you can see him raising his fist, slamming it down in the face of such obvious proof I was NOT fit for God’s kingdom. And when he rallied his last strength, and heaved the last, weighty, deadly accusations upon the mountainous pile beside him, the music dies down…fading…as if we all wait to hear what God’s verdict will be.

And then, He begins, declaring firmly and steadily, that, because of Christ’s holy blood shed for me, I am safe! I am His, and He is mine. He knows what I have done. He knows who I am. He knows it all. And yet, He said, there is therefore no condemnation upon me any further, because I have welcomed Christ’s gift to me, salvation, and have bowed low and worship Him as Lord, and I am HIS! That’s it. No more.

Then the music begins to slowly fade down, and wrap up. It is as if He has enfolded me in the royal robes of His glory, and we have both turned, and are walking away, with our backs to the accuser.

And then the music displays it all, the SILENCE of the accuser, and the doors of heaven slamming shut, locked, behind us, forever1

If you have never listened to the piece of music before, I hope you will someday. And if you have listened before, I hope you got goose-bumps with me, as you imagined all I said, happening to the score.

My "New Normal"

I've finally settled into my "new normal".
Feels like I finally found my balance and adjusted to this new season.
Every now & then it's a bit overwhelming....
but that's usually when I'm worrying about the future,
and I'm childishly seeing it without God present.
As soon as I remember HE will be there too, no matter what happens,
His amazing & powerful peace returns.
(Thank you to the author Sarah Young, for the devotion yesterday
pointing this out!)

Being a counselor is much harder work than I ever imagined...
it is so much more than just listening well.
Listening well is really just the beginning. Sigh......
Thinking critically, while I'm listening, is a whole new skill
I'm just now beginning to learn about.

Then depending on the Holy Spirit in the midst of it all
is a whole nother dimension.

Sprinkle on top of all that, life's busyness, stressors, trivial issues,
all while trying to keep a balance on my own spiritual, emotional
& physical health...and it's really a lot to learn to juggle.
But if I don't keep myself balanced, then I will be an IN-effective counselor.

And I'm trying to remember that "balance" is not a static thing.
It's more of a dynamic thing, as I learn to "flow" and adjust
to the changes around me.
(Thank you to author Valorie Burton in Listen to Your Life
for this new understanding of "balance".)

Thank you for sharing in my "reflecting". :)

Further thoughts of kid's being like mirrors...

...as I was struggling with Grace's unwillingness to let go of wadded up papers, broken toys, baby-toys, and other "useless garbage" in my opinion...it suddenly dawned on me, what kind of "useless garbage" is God trying to coax out of my hands/heart/life? What am I so desperately holding onto, clinging to, willing to even CRY if He dares try to talk me out of giving up?

Is her unwillingness to give up this stuff an obvious, in-your-face sign...or maybe a less-obvious, subtle sign, causing me to just stop & think....hmmmmmm.....

Just food for thought~